Is anyone still out there?

•November 10, 2014 • 15 Comments

I was cleaning up some files the other day and came across my passwords for “The World According to Woman” and wondered if anyone still reads this blog? Does anyone still follow it?

Woman shares her deepest regret… Guilt.

•August 2, 2013 • 3 Comments

I saw a six year old little girl in my class today. 

She’s a new student at this training centre I am working at this summer. 

I looked into her eyes and I finally realised just what it meant to have a deep seeded regret. 

Every time I looked at her as my eyes scanned the classroom, my heart beat faster and my whole body screamed out at how stupid I was. 

I am sitting here in my apartment, weeping. It was not that big of a reality check in the slightest. I knew that he got married and had a child. I knew this years ago. 

But it wasn’t a reality till I looked into her big brown eyes and at her curious expression at why was I searching her face to see what of her father was there. And trying to catch a glimpse of what her mother might look like. 

Have I met her? Did I meet her in the past at some time during my last visit here? 

The realisation sunk in- rather it blew me away. This little girl… she could have been mine.  Continue reading ‘Woman shares her deepest regret… Guilt.’

Woman shares the news from the North Korea area…

•July 28, 2013 • 4 Comments

Well how didly do ladies and gents!

I am sitting here at work over my break- lunch break that is- writing
to you. Many things have happened here and many things have been

Needless to say, life is so very interesting here in the lovely
province of Liaoning.

Firstly, let me tell you some info about this place that is my tempory
home. Liaoning is indeed a strange place. The city has quite literally
exploded in size since my last visit here during the Spring Festival
2006. It was winter when I was last here, and while here, I was told
about how cool and wonderful the summers are.

I call bullshit.

I call some serious bullshit.

It has been so very hot and humid and raining elephants and horses for
days and days. We’ve actually had the city water turned off to try to
let the pipes drain properly. Never heard of that one before! But then
again, this is China and China makes sense to the people that live

Well, sometimes they do.

The city I am in is so very green. And right by the river that
separates North Korea from China. It was funny when I was asking some
local people about the “latest North Korean situation”. They kind of
laughed saying that the people here consider North Korea to be like a
spoilt little child always wanting to get their own way. I chuckled
and stated that it sounds like the Quebec folks who wanted (still want
to???) separate from the rest of Canada without taking the debt with

So that puts my mind to rest.

Other than the wet and humid and hot weather, it’s quite pleasent.
I’ve no air conditioner in my home, and the temps reach upwards of 30C
and I’ve not had a thought of needing one. It’s quite cool at night to

We drove up along the river the other day and I did try to kick my own
ass for not bringing my camera with me to demand to stop and take some
pictures to share with the world wide web. The China side of things is
booming with activity and growth not to mention copious amounts of
tall buildings and a Walmart (yes, those things are everywhere). The
Korea side is…. simpler.

Not simpler in a bad way, just more green and some what looks like
fishing villages and oodles of greenery.

It was quite the contrast.

There are many bridges- yes. I did indeed get weak in the knees
looking at all those bridges- ut only a few of them will take you all
the way across to Korea. I cannot wait to grab Legs and demand he take
me to a bunch of touristy sites and some un-heard of touristy sites
here to explore.

Speaking of Legs, he has requested that I teach him many things that I
know. I just rose my eyebrow, grinned impishly and said, “Oh? And what
shall I teach you first?” Silly bugger just grinned back at me.

Flirting with Chinese men is a task I tell you. You never know if you
are making head way or just… or just falling flat on your face. It’s
difficult I tell you. Chinese women are more open and it is kind of
accepted that Chinese women date foreign men. But for a foreign woman,
it is not as widely accepted.

Which I don’t get at all to be honest. In the next few years, there
will be over 30million men in this country whno will never get married
or have a girlfriend. And the government is working on getting the
common person to be ok with gay men.

So wouldn’t it kind of make sense for it to be accepted that Chinese
men date foreign women????

See! This is part of what makes it difficult for me here. Especially
with new men in my life.

Meh. Whatever. I’ll put him in a comprimising position and I’ll find
out soon enough.

And back to Liaoning!!!

I am used to seeing mountains in the cities I live in, but those
mountains are usually off in the distance where you have to travel a
little ways to see them up close and personally. Here? It’s
amazing!!!! I actually get to travel through a mountain, then around a
mountain to get to one of the locations where I work.

It’s freaking awesome!!!!!!!

Ok. I need food. My students have decided to share with me a diease.
Now I am ill. So I must eat some garlic to try to get rid of it. Thank
goodness all people smell of garlic here!!!!

Ta ta for now!


Woman thanks her maker for that man’s body….

•July 21, 2013 • Leave a Comment

Good afternoon ladies and gents!

I am sitting here at an office desk looking at the most stunning leg I have seen in quite a number of years. The ass that this leg belongs too is just… well.. I cannot beleive it belongs to a Chinese man either. All I have to say is thank goodness these computers are lined up where I get to sit behind him for a little while.

And stare. 

And gawk. 

And think about said leg thrown over my body while the owner of said leg slumbers. 

Life here has gotten a wee bit complicated in which I had this very interesting dream the other night, and now every single time I look at some of my co-workers, I have to divert my eyes and look somewhere else and not in their eyes. Otherwise I would break out laughing. This dream wouldn’t let me sleep and had me tossing and turning the whole night. Then I made sure to let him know that when I drink, I have a tendency to try to remove mens clothing.

Much to their enjoyment it seems. I apologised in advanced, and all said that I shouldn’t worry, and that they would wear button down shirts for my ease. 

How nice my friends are!!! 

I just celebrated my birthday the other day, and I am long past thirty, and I am still waiting for that moment where I begin to think, golly I am old. But it has yet to come. I still wonder from time to time exactly how old I am, and notta. I am more shocked that I am celebrating the start of my twelfth year here in China. That seems to be more of an achievement then spinning around the sun a few dozen times. 

What an accomplishment!

I woke up the other day while at dinner as I was told, you have a habit of only staying in one place for about six years. Why not come here and live in this city with us? I do have to say my- well my various body parts seems to think that idea was a super fine one.

It would be interesting to move here. It would really be interesting to move here. I mean, people here? I can talk about Star Trek for hours and hours and hours. And then more hours on top of that. THEN I can sit around with people who actually like Star Trek and watch it. And talk about how freaking amazing George Takei really is. Compared to my life at the moment in Inner Mongolia…. that I have to admit is something that is really really really tempting. And something that I am actually considering. The move to Liaoning Province. Is it in my future? 

It is something that would seriously interest me simply because of the amount of conversations I can have. The social aspect is something that I really think I miss. Something I think I have been craving but not knowing I’ve missed it. If this makes any sense… for I am a wee bit confuddled. 

Not to mention that ass on that Chinese man!!!! And how his body just screams power in a nonchalance way. Oh yes ladies and gentlemen. I am in deep lust for this man’s body. I’ve not seen such a fine specimen of human flesh in quite a while. 

I must find his mother and father and thank them for that ass. Even if I never get to see it sans clothing. I should still say thank-you to his parents for such a fine backside. I mean really, everyone should always be thankful to beautiful things.

I was dragged along last week to the boys weekly poker night and insisted I learn how to play poker. Turns out I am pretty good. But I still do not get how a person is “good” at poker. You are stuck with the cards you are given.It’s a random chance thing. You get cards, cards are shown. There ain’t nothing more you can do about it. But I seemed to do something called “cleaned house”. I was accused of hustling the guys at the table. Then this little girl got jealous because her boyfriend decided to kiss my cheek in an apology for some nasty words.

Maybe I don’t want to move here after all.


I can do without it.

But then there was last Monday night. I teach this adult class of workers at a factory who are truly a joy to teach. They came out and some co-workers and I decided to drink as we normally would all the while, some of these Chinese folks, would never drink like this. So he was so giggly drunk at this BBQ. It was so cute!!!!!!!!! All he did was walk around all night talking about how drunk he was and how much he loved everyone.

It really was cute!

Liaoning really has changed a lot since the last time I was here. It got BIG. Like it kind of blew up from the inside out. And because so many of the streets are just too small for all the traffic, the government decided to forgo epanding the streets, and instead renamed them and made them one way. It makes sense, but gosh darnit, it is wicked confusing.

Anyways, I am going to sign off now and try to wake up a little, I’ve got many more classes before I get to call it a day. And then I have a Walmart run this evening to pick up some food stuff for poker on Tuesday. We have my big birthday celebration tomorrow after work and the ladies I work with are excited to be invited, but they’ll be gone pretty quick while the fun ones will still be around to drink more and more and more.

It is the plan of many to just get ripped shit faced for my birthday. And in any case, I have to build up my reputation for the next time I come to visit. Since I am not permitted to live it down, may as well add to it and make sure that I become an even bigger legend in this city.

Ta ta and thanks for all the tequila.

Greetings from near North Korea!!!

•July 14, 2013 • 4 Comments

Hello all! 

I am trying to keep my promise and post an update or two each week while on my summer vacation. 

It is not really a summer vacation. It is more a work vacation with some old friends, some new friends and beer. Dear lord. I have missed just sitting around after work and having a drink and laughing. 

With people who speak English!!! 

This was what my holiday this summer was to be about. Work and fun. 

And golly, it has only been a couple days since I’ve been here, and it has been hilarious. 

My old friend has been telling stories about his mythical time with this giant Canadian woman who likes to get s little wild every once in a while. And I am so glad I came. And was able to come. So a private shout out to my local city’s Police Office Zhu for making it possible!!! 

I was given an apartment in a not so nice part of town, but like most things in mainland China, to the outside observer it might not look too pretty, but get on the inside and it is none to shabby. 

My new co-workers get a laugh from my way of playing the Chinese “game” and how the new boss of the school I am working at is a little intimidated by me. They have sent me up to the office so many times today to ask for something or to get something that has always been just out of their reach. Which makes my old friend laugh and chuckle claiming that this all adds to the legend that is already there. 

It all makes me chuckle with amusement. It’s really hilarious to be known as a legend and to know that my reputation is just not as a “teacher” but as a person as well. 

It’s hot. It’s humid and I forgot how long it takes clothes to dry in this type of climate. Where I live in Inner Mongolia a humid day is about 35% humidity with themps getting into the mid thirties. Here???? I have no idea. But you cannot walk a step without sweating, your hair never fully dries and your clothes always feel like you have walked out of the shower wearing them. But… my skin is loving it and everyone else is sweating. So it is all good!!! 

I saw this woman today whose make-up started to literally fall off her face like she was melting. It was so funny to watch!!! 

And there is so much fruit here!!! I am at the moment eating fresh blueberries (I’ve not had fresh blueberries since I was last in Canada), cherries and grapes. You have any idea just how expensive grapes and cherries are where I live??? It is sooooo good to see them so cheap!!! I even had to ask the store clerk if her listing price was wrong. I couldn’t beleive it!!!

So of course with the cheap cost of blueberries, my mouth is jam packed with them and I am trying to say chubby bunny before I squish them all. 

Anyways, this was a quick pop in to visit with you all… I am being beckoned. OH! There is a massage parlour right outside of my apartment door that does hour long massages, acupuncture and cupping… how amazing is that!!!!! Get off work, lay down get rubbed up, then walk next door and I am home. 


PS- very important if you live in China and are planning on renewing your visa or visiting China for the first time:

Guess what I got??? And more with Woman…

•July 11, 2013 • 6 Comments

That’s right ladies and gents… I got my new visa in my greedy little hands and I have people working on my tickets as we speak. The person working on my visa right now is an old friend of mine who basically said that I shouldn’t worry about anything he will get me to him by Saturday night.

So guess who is sitting here thinking of her wardrobe trying to figure out what to pack?

Not to mention… I thought I would have a few more days at least to figure everything out!!!

But I have decided which toys I am going to bring… Nothing too big, just my Jopen and probably something else. I don’t need more than my Jopen, but it is nice to have the option of having something else to play with.

I need to find my nipple clamps.

Anyways, I have my visa and my passport so I am free to run around in and out of China mooning the world and plan to spend Saturday night if all goes well shit faced like I was 22 again. Well, I haven’t seen this crew of people since I was I think 24 so it will be fun for us all to drink a bottle of Jim, Jack or Johnnie and see if we can still stand on our heads without getting into trouble.  Continue reading ‘Guess what I got??? And more with Woman…’

A Woman and her chair…

•July 8, 2013 • 11 Comments

I believe I have told you about my new granny smith green bean bag chair. This thing is so wickedly comfortable. But it is huge!!!!

It is quite seriously, one the most comfortable chair or couch I’ve been in in a very very long time. And a hammock doesn’t count.

My new home has had a constant stream of visitors, mostly students wanting to see how a foreigner lives. It has been quite the interesting time. But the constant dust is killing me!!! I have to sweep my floors twice a day and wash them daily just to try to keep some of the dust at bay.

Anyways, I’ve had a little bit of free time now that school for me is over, I’ve taken up a part time job at a local private school with my schools permission of course… but it is only for sure this week. That’s not so bad, because it all depends on my visa. I just really want to make my way to Liaoning for the summer. I’d like nothing more then to just let my hair down and relax with a few friends for a while.  Continue reading ‘A Woman and her chair…’


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