Please meet Harold… Woman’s Brain Hamster

Greetings from the Land of the Middle Kingdom and from Harold my Brain Hamster!!!

Yup. I have a hamster living in my brain spinning on his wheel. You will learn when I have properly fed him as then the posts will be very fun, witty and oh so very clever. Then there are days where I just forget to and the posts are still fun, witty but very rambley.

Well!!! This is all about me… So where do I start?

With me of course!!!!

I am an ageless wonder, with the brain of an ancient, the heart of a child and both of those trapped in the body of a woman.

I belong to an online erotic site The Lusty Library, and am mostly known there as Woman, Ms Funny Pants, Tramp, Smoochy, Ice Princess (not because of a cold heart, but just because I like the cold weather!!!!) and quite a few more names that I really cannot remember them all. I was in Canada when I was signing up to join, and my sister was yelling at me to hurry up. And I was having issues trying to figure out a screen name. She hollered in at me, “WOMAN!!!! Hurry your lily white ass up!” And “Woman” was born.

Well, and with my whole family calling me “China”, Woman or China is what everyone outside of work calls me anyways.  Come to think of it, I cannot even remember the last time I was called by my given name.  Odd that is.

Meh. What’s in a name anyways?

Babbling. I tend to babble and to ramble. If you haven’t already noticed. And then get side tracked with my own thoughts. And yes. I know I am quite the loopy Woman, but… It’s like I’ve always said. You have to be crazy to live in China. And since I’ve been here for almost a decade…. you bet your knickers I am almost to far gone to save!!! But who needs saving when you have mangoes almost season!!!!

Something neat about China….The Great Firewall of China. I love it. And I hate it. And living in China? I’ll be sure to let you know about some of the more whacky things I get up to. If I am ever away for a period of time, it is usually because something is up with the Firewall and is just not accessible again for a time.  Never fear.  I shall find ways to post things!!! It might not be me doing the posting, might be me pulling the …er… strings; but I won’t be gone too long!!! And then… be careful… any chance I get I try to bridge the gap between China and the West.

This blog is basically about how I see myself and the world in the world I live in. Welcome to the culture, welcome to the world, welcome to my brain and welcome to the place I call home. TIFC. It is a place for me to come, to write down the current thought in my head, to work out a problem, to share a thought or two of a more erotic nature or just to share a laugh. For I beleive that sex is not “naughty” nor “bad”; but that between consenting adults, we can find humour, arousal, a shared interest and share our experiences. Or just share some fun and erotic stories at my expense.  I am stared at enough here because I am not Chinese, may as well be stared at for something I enjoy doing is the way I see it!!

So, on we go!!!!

Here are some links to various posts with a short little ditty explaining why you might enjoy them!!!!

Erotic Stories: Here you will find all the erotic and lush stories I’ve written, and even a more erotic and arousing blog post or two. Many of my stories are not what most find on the web. They are very detailed, on the longer side, and just fun!!!! There are masturbation stories, lesbian. bisexual, exhibitionism, voyeurism, kinky, romantic, tragic, humourous… and so much more. And usually all of these in one story.

The Toy Box According to Woman: Here you will find quite a few “how to” posts; How to take erotic photos (yes, I got to play model for this post!!!), how to get free sex toys, how to pick and choose a new sex toy and how to pick a sex toy for men, and lots lots more!!! lots of sex toy reviews, tricks and ideas for using your sex toys to get off on.

Thoughts on People/ Thoughts on the World: Just your general everyday kind of thoughts that we all think,  but these are mine. From men acting like wankers, to wearing smartballs to work, to how I see a co-worker, a man willing to buy my ova for millions of dollars. Sometimes thoughtful, sometimes wacky, sometimes out of this world and sometimes? You’ll look at the page and go… what the heck???

The World According to Woman is a sex positive site, where everyone is free to express themselves. Female masturbation is frequently the topic of the post as my goal is to tear down the veil that so many people in the world have about women and masturbating. My goal is to speak openly and honest, blunt from time to time about what my body does and the drive I have that sometimes, drives me batty.

My hope for The World According to Woman is to demonstrate to other women of the world, that we do not need to feel ashamed of our bodies and what our bodies can do. We need not feel ashamed that our bodies can bring us pleasure with or even without a man. And my hope, is to help others to explore their sexuality as well.

And one of my personal favourites; which had many of you going “OUCH! Poor Woman!” but had most people laughing at my own misfortune is…. A Woman in the StirrupsJust another day in China where you wake up and realise that your vagina has a lump and it is not going away. So off tot he hospital I go!!! And little while later I find myself naked, thighs tied into the stirrups, in an operating room in China, where no one speaks English and the drug man was making comments about my breasts in Chinese.

Happy reading and have a very fine day in Harold’s World!!!!

Lots of humps and giggles and please make this the motto of the decade…. masturbate for peace!!!


PS- Because I love to pimp other peoples work… here is a link to lots of people’s blogs!!!

~ by Woman on June 3, 2010.

11 Responses to “Please meet Harold… Woman’s Brain Hamster”

  1. A wonderful introduction and I , for one, am thrilled to know you! Looking forward to reading more about your adventures:) xoxo

  2. very good now shush lol

  3. Hey Woman, or hey China, lmao…

  4. Oh. Thanks for liking my photography. Just noticed the roll over.:) It’s also been a passion. Just wish I could make some cash doing it.

  5. Hello… mmm… mangoes… I love mangoes also. I am sure your breasts are as delicious as the taste of ripe mangoes… anyway, thank you for commenting on my blog. Yes, please let’s share links (I already linked yours since I have been reading your blog and like your writing). I follow you on twitter as well. I agree with you on many levels (such as the words “naughty” and “bad” as used for sex… I don’t believe it’s naughty or bad, just delicious). Looking forward to reading more on your delicious blog! xo Butterfly

  6. Wow, I’m impressed! You have a lovely finesse for writing erotica! I have written quite a few stories and poems with sex scenes and I wish I could capture passion/romance the way you’re able to. Bravo!

    PS. I’m glad you enjoyed Twolips😉

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